Probably The Best Flash Fiction In The World

KBP’s 2014 moment of triumph re-lived!

Tara Sparling writes

Because….. we have a WINNER!

Amid much anguish, hand-wringing, and a few stomach ulcers, the results are in.

The winner sprang straight out of the Literary Fiction Title Generator. There were more than several reasons for the entry published below being the winner, but fewer reasons separating it from the very close runners-up, making it a very tough decision indeed.

Nevertheless, the Estimable, Impartial and Utterly Respectable Guest Judge  had to finally settle on this winner because:

  1. It’s bloody brilliant.
  2. It is also very funny.
  3. The flash fiction was supposed to be in the style of the title generator from which it took inspiration, and you don’t get more literary than James Joyce, now do you?
  4. It was assigned 54,879 points for the last line alone.

So without further ado, congratulations and a €50 Amazon voucher are winging their way to Katie Purcell, for the rather marvellous:

Old Glassworks

The Dominant Glassworks in Donnybrook

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2014: A tale of Donnybrook glassworks and leafy bottoms!

2014: Katie B. sits on her laurels!

the-dominant-glassworks-of-donnybrookOf course, there are some authors who wouldn’t be seen dead resting on their laurels! Not so, Katie B.! Why else would she be so well-padded in the posterior department, if not to be able to repose on a few crispy Laurus nobilis leaves for half a year or longer? Oh, well, at least the yearly review’ll be short and sweet! Don’t say I don’t spoil you!

So, here it is: Katie B.’s attempt to channel James Joyce won her the Tara Sparling Writes’ Flash Fiction Book Title Generator Competition in 2014. Whooop, whoop, yippee!  I’ve reblogged it again, in case any of you missed it earlier (hey, I told you these laurels were well-sat on!).

And congrats to Tara Sparling for garnering some serious laurels for herself with a Best Newcomer Blog win at the 2014 Blog Awards Ireland. No better woman and a well-deserved win. Noch einmal: whooop, whoop, yippee!

2015: Katie B. gets off her laurel-resting ass and writes stuff!

As to what’s on the agenda for 2015? Now that’s a different matter! I have whole heap of New Year Writing Resolutions jostling for pole position at the moment, but which to choose? Preferably one that will have more staying power than a single snowflake floating above the volcanic core of Mount Doom!autumn leaves 001

Actually, come to think of it, given my track record with New Year Resolutions of any description so far, I think’ll I’ll forget them and go for a 2015 mantra instead. And lo, here’s one I prepared earlier: ‘NO EXCUSES’. That’s right! No more ‘I’m too tired‘, ‘I’ve too much to do‘, ‘I don’t have enough time to write‘, ‘I can’t write when it’s snowing, raining, the sun is shining [please delete as appropriate],  ‘I have to wash my hair‘, ‘I have to wash the cat‘, ‘I have to watch my nails grow‘, and all the other paltry excuses I’ve used in the past years to stop myself writing.

Time to kick-ass! Katie B. Purcell’s ass to be precise! So in 2015 get off those bloody laurels before they turn to dust, girl, and get that novel finished! G’wan, you will, you will, you WILL!

Winner!

It’s not every day a girl gets to inaugurate her new author website with a win, but thanks to Tara Sparling at Tara Sparling writes and her Estimable, Impartial and Utterly Respectable Guest Judge, Katie Purcell (with or without the B) has done just that!

Yes, I am chuffed and honoured that  my modest attempt to channel James Joyce was announced as the winner of the Flash Fiction Book Generator Title Competition, particularly I am sure it had to scramble over a heap of other fantastic entries to get to the top.

And don’t worry, I have it from a number of reliable sources that violent spinning in his grave can’t actually harm a dead Irish literary giant – well, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

Tara and Estimable Guest Judge  – I thank you again – along with my mother, bless her souls (both of them), my father, 265 of my nearest relatives, my cat, my dog, my dead cat, my dead dog, my other dead dog, my sister’s dead cat(s), etc, etc… [bursts into tears and blows nose loudly].

Yipee, I’m a winner!!